Promises, Promises

Murray the Dog was sick for 5 days. The fact that his stomach wasn’t happy with him isn’t surprising because he will eat or lick anything off the street, sidewalk, floor, walls, strangers’ pant legs, passing cat, etc. And yes, he did learn “Leave it!” in obedience class… all three times.

The problem is, “Leave it!” only works when the “it” in question isn’t — in Murray’s opinion — delectable.

In my 35 years of dachshund motherhood, I’ve had a lot of pups who sampled things I would have thought were inedible. Slate chewed through an oak cabinet door to try to reach the dog food. He pooped splinters for a week. Justin would eat dog-toy squeakers if I didn’t watch him every second. Maddy Lou thought daffodil bulbs and rocks should be on the menu every day.

Is it any wonder I’ve become a helicopter dog-parent?

Every time one of my dogs gets sick I make them promises. “I’ll take you to the beach if your vet bill is under $200!” “I’ll let you NOT take a bath if you stop throwing up.” “I won’t make you wear that pink tutu in public if you wake up tomorrow acting completely healthy again!”

I could have promised Murray that I’d throw the ball 1000 times in a row, but I practically do that already. So instead, I promised him something I knew would motivate him: “You can leap on anyone you want for a week.”

So far, we’ve had six guests. As they approach the front door, I explain my bargain with Murray. They may or may not catch it all due to the loud barking from Katja and Sanders, but I ask them to consent to being lept on.

Each guests has left with muddy paw prints on their pants and jackets. Murray could not be happier. Or healthier.